Retrenchment, Day 40

It's day 40; 238 to go. This is also week four of the fall semester at BSU. In the afternoon today the faculty senate will be meeting. On Wednesday the Provost and Dean have set an appointment to talk with me about the Z-Degree proposal. Friday I have a department meeting. So I'll be interacting -- or at least observing -- quite a bit on campus this week.

One of the things that strikes me, lately, is the subjective nature of time. I think my days are much more full this semester than they have been in previous semesters. I suspect I'm a bit more awake. Although I typically worked pretty steadily in the past, I think I'm doing more now. I used to be keep track of my work hours using an app called Tyme 3. I was pretty proud when I would get beyond sixty hours in a week, and I began observing that my work would often come in big blocks that didn't really conform to a typical Monday to Friday 9 to 5.

Ironically, I have not been using the app since the retrenchment. But I still think I'm staying pretty busy. And as I've mentioned before, the daily discipline of posting a Retrenchment diary entry has kept me focused on the need to be thinking about and doing something about my situation daily. I'm a bit concerned that for others, the issue is not quite as high on their daily list of priorities.

The faculty senate meets on the first Monday of the month. That means they will have about eight or nine opportunities to discuss the retrenchment before it actually happens. Similarly, they mapped out the four "meet and confer" dates between now and when the administration needs to announce program changes, to respond to the Deans' proposal for restructuring. While I assume people will be working on those issues in preparation for these meetings, I still wonder whether they will get done whatever it is they want to do, in the time they've allotted?

I suspect they don't feel quite the urgency I do. And I wonder whether part of the difference in the ways I imagine our perception of time differs, has to do with being active or reactive? I feel like the clock is ticking, because I think I need to do something. Yes, I'm reacting to what has happened to me. But the way I've chosen to react is to do something different, and I'm trying to figure out what that something should be and begin doing it. I think the folks who used to be my peers are thinking more in terms of only reacting. Saying something, rather than doing something. Although they may take the statement they'll be planning seriously, I don't think planning to say something is as empowering as planning to do something.

Or maybe I'm just impatient. In the past, I've often rolled my eyes at the ways bureaucracies grind along like glaciers or turn like aircraft carriers. I've been frustrated by slow, incremental changes that groups I've been in have celebrated, when I thought they should be focusing on problems they agreed to table in order to get the increment. When I attend the senate meeting I'll try to listen with an open mind, but I really hope I see some movement toward action.

Link to YouTube: